If you have lost your innocence, you may be trying to ignore the awful pain that you are going through. The thoughts and pictures that may be going through your head may be more than you can bare. The worst thing you can do right now is put up a barrier. Take all this pain to God. Let him sort through what to do with it, let Him carry all your burden.

“Cast your burden on the Lord, And He shall sustain you; He shall never permit the righteous to be moved.” Psalm 55:22